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😊😊😊

I'm absolutely bowled over by it, Luisa - to the point of needing to lie down in a darkened room! It was such a lovely surprise - Substack had e-mailed me to let me know shortly before their post went live, but I didn't pick up any e-mails until later this afternoon, so I was like, 'whaaaaat???!!!' 🫣🥳🤣

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😘

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Thanks so much, Luisa!

Yes, it's brilliant, isn't it, how one's colleagues/friends/fellow committee members seem to think we're superhuman?! My old boss in London used to reprimand me several times a day for 'not looking at what you're doing'. Clueless! (him, not me!) 🤣

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Very amusing. I will have more to say later, but right now I have my head in a bowl of steam (everyone needs a hobby). But for now: I can't believe I allowed myself to become friends with someone who hates buses. You never mentioned that on your Tinder profile

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A thought: how far could you get in an oulipo piece using one row's letters? Maybe you'd need two rows?

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A great idea for exploring, Mark. I'd been thinking of a typewriter-inspired idea myself, thanks to Rebecca's letter

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Can't wait to read it!

Thinking about it, I've got a story suggestion for you in that respect: It's about a character called Sal, and she really enjoys eating fruit salad. The thing is, Seville oranges are off the menu for her, because she'd need all three rows of the QWERTY keyboard... that's why she sticks to jaffas.

Helpful? I have more... 🤣

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Thanks. Would love to hear your others. The idea I had was a bit different. I need to work on it. Working on a puzzle post at the moment instead of reading the three books I need to have reviewed by Monday.

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Oooh, I've got a puzzle post on the boil, too! I've worked out the working-out bit, but I can't quite make the leap into writing the actual story that conceals the workings-out...! 🤣

THREE books to review by Monday? Blimey, Terry! Get to it!

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Yes, plus homework for a creative rotting course on Monday plus having to read 200+ pages of a novel I don't much like by Tuesday. It's a Booker Prizewinner, and I was one of only three people in the class who thought it was not very good. I always make the mistake of saying what I think. That's why I haven't been knighted. At least, I can't think of any other reason.

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GENIUS idea, Mark! Wish I'd had it...! 🤣

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Have you got ANOTHER cold, Terry? I do hope not!

I'm gonna ditch that Tinder profile. 😉

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I've always got a cold, Rebecca. There was even a song written about me: The Englishman and his usual Bloody Cold: https://sonichits.com/video/Paddy_Roberts/L'_Anglais_Avec_Son_Sang_Fraid Actually, it's cos my Eustachian tubes are bunged up. Good move about that profile. Chortle

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Oh, I love a bit of song satire! I haven't listened, but the lyrics are BRILLIANT! 🤣

Oh, and commiserations on the cold. 🤧

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Clever ducky!

I didn't learn to type until I was in my late late 50's and what a challenge!

I do agree with pen and paper though. It's something I've never been able to define - happier writing a novel in longhand, an intimate process. And the bonus is that one gets to go to the stationer's and pick paper and pen. My dream would be a Mont Blanc pen. Oooh la la!

Do you ever think 'Oh, that pen would be nice?'

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Prue, you're so right about writing by hand being an 'intimate process'!

Ooooh, a Mont Blanc pen sounds like the ultimate luxury! I have - hmmm, had, because I'm not sure where it is - a lovely Parker fountain pen from when I was a teenager, used every day at school. The bright pink fountain pen I use for most of my drafts (when I haven't left it in the van, that is!) is one which I won in a prize draw at a stationery shop - it's a Stabilo, and although it's not on the level of luxury offered by Mont Blanc and all the other gorgeous brands out there, it writes so very smoothly that it feels like a treat to write with it every time I pick it up. 😊

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Gosh, clever you winning a prize. Stabilo are nice - they flow as one writes. But Parkers are great, husband uses them and if I remember rightly, it was a Parker that King Charles used on that fateful day at Hillsborough Castle last year.

Dad and Mum gave me a Parker for my first uni year. These days, I buy packets of bulk Bic's. So boring and unromantic!

Truthfully, with my skill at 'accidents', I can envisage ink from a fountain pen going all over a manuscript, so biros it will be. But maybe a 'top of the tree' biro one day...

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Parker pen had a factory in Newhaven, East Sussex, until 2011 when it relocated to France. Newhaven is pretty close to where I went to school - I remember being very jealous of another class's field trip to visit the factory!

'Bulk Bics'! 'Top of the tree biro'! LOVE these!!!

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Lovely article, Rebecca. I’ve always had the same experience with buses and find it absolutely infuriating . I had to stop myself from laughing and waking the house up when you said you use “blah” for the semicolon 😂

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Thanks, Camille! LOL re 'blah'! It's a pretty good syllable-saver in any number of scenarios! 🤣

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I wish I had learned such keyboard skills as you. I have to look at the keyboard constantly. I've tried notebook writing but I make so many cross-outs and corrections that I just end up with a mess.

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I'll let you into a secret, Jim - I had a very bad attitude at the business college where it came to learning how to touch-type numbers... I STILL can't do those! One of these days I must find an online touch-typing course to train me how to hit those ten buttons without looking! 🤣

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Mrs. Mether's typing class in the 8th Grade changed my life. I'm a very proud 60 wpm typist.

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Jul 1, 2023Liked by Rebecca Holden

I fell in love with my high school typing teacher. I did nothing but moon at him longingly. I still type with four fingers and have to watch....

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🤣

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I wanted to prove you could type really fast and also chew gum. She did not approve of my goal or my methods.

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Oh, that's hilarious!!! 🤣 DID you prove it, though? If not, which of the tandem goals prevailed? Were you in fact an excellent typist but a rubbish gum-chewer? Or vice versa? Do tell!

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I love that you still know her name, TBD! The best teachers live long in our memories, don't they? I'll never forget Mr Anderson, who taught me German. He was amazing!

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She changed my life—but she definitely did not enjoy the experience of having me as a student. Also Frau Galer.

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Jul 1, 2023Liked by Rebecca Holden

I loved this bit: "By then I had my own electric typewriter cum word processor, complete with correction ribbon – yes, my machine had a ‘delete’ key! " I well remember, too, the little white bits of correction paper I used before I got a self-correcting machine. I can still feel the hum and vibration of my bright red ( huge) Selelctric under my fingers. Thanks Rebecca for taking me back! I didn't get my first computer until 1982. It was love at first draft.

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'Love at first draft' - oh, Sharron, you have such a beautiful way of expressing things - perfect!

In fact, the typewriters at the business school did have a delete key, BUT they didn't load the machines with the cassette of ribbon for that function - LOL! I could have scored much higher on many assignments if they had! 🤣 That would've been cheating, though....!

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My further comments:

1. Back in the year dot I won £50 on the premium bonds. We used it to buy a portable typewriter. IOt's in the loft. It's like new.

2. I was once asked to teach a Year 11 class of boys typing. They had to work their way through a book, and I had to supervise. They were using BBC Micros, and they worked out how to make the screen flash different colours and to play tunes. I told them if the Head walked in to switch back to typing skills.

3. I regret not having learnt typing. I'm pretty proficient and quick, but touch-typing would be the bees' knees.

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Jul 1, 2023·edited Jul 1, 2023Author

1. Year-dot typewriters are pretty collectable, Terry - if you don't want it you could probably sell it!

2. I love that the level of authority you chose to exert over that class of Year 11s was simply to tell them to switch back to what they were supposed to be doing IF the Head walked in! I expect you were very popular! 🤣

3. I'm going to seek out an online course to get me using the number keys properly. They're the only ones I can't use without looking - and I have no excuse! I had made a conscious decision not to really bother with the lessons on numbers, because by then I was a typing demon with the letter keys, and felt I had learned as much as I needed. Oh, the idiocy of youth! Need to brush up on those.

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I was a strict disciplinarian most of the time, but those kids didn't want to be there, they'd been put there just to fill up their timetable. I thought that finding out how to turn the keyboard into a synthesiser was more useful than being made to do something they hated.

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I agree! I wonder if any of them work in the music tech field now? I like to think so!

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Me too!

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Congrats on your recommend on Substack Reads! 💜 I think that was my favourite read of yours although I have so many now! I also loved the buttons piece and the book one! Ahhh how can I choose? Loved the froggies though and were always hopeful some frogspawn survives!! 🐸

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Claire, that means such a lot to me - thank you so much! I'm glad you enjoy my Art & Treasures posts - I like to do them as a punctuation point at the end of the month. Part of my own unofficial little Substack timetable, and it's nice to have a reason to get creative in picture terms once in a while! 🤣

In case I haven't mentioned it recently, I drink in all of your posts - I love what you have to say! 😘

(I've just been really bold and added my 'Substack Featured Publication' badge to my 'About' page! Giggled for an entire five minutes.... and then nearly deleted it because I was like: 🫣😲👀

🤣

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Art and Treasures oh that’s such a wonderful title yes I feel like it’s becoming familiar and I lurch with excitement a bit when it’s one of those types! Ahh I love that 🥇 you definitely should have that front and centre. It’s a delightful badge of honour and so well deserved - your writing is stunning. ✨💜 thanks for your kind words about mine I feel I’ve really started to find my way here. ✨🌀🙏

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🙌💃✨

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This post brought back fond memories of learning to type on the IBM Selectric in college, I think it was called. After that I became a court reporter which uses a different machine than a typewriter, but we had to be able to type over 200 words a minute, a skill which took over two years of practice to develop. I still at times imagine typing along with someone speaking. I can also relate to your regrets (for lack of a better word). I have at times wondered if instead of practicing on a court reporting machine, I had spent those hours practicing the piano. I actually wrote a post about that some time ago, before Substack. 💜

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200 wpm??? AWESOME, Sue!!! 🙌

And gosh, re piano practice vs reporting practice! Makes you think!!! 🎵

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Doesn't it? But that's life, always a compromise. If we turn right, we'll never know what was down that path to the left. I've got no regrets though. Just every once in a while I do "think."

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Ah yes, those 'sliding doors' moments! 😊

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Another great post to read! I enjoy your writing so much!!! 💕

I never learned typing the traditional way. I guess I learned by doing. I always wish I could have taken the keyboarding class offered at my high school when we first moved to the States from Germany but I needed other classes for credit towards my diploma, so couldn’t.

I’m in the process of looking for translation jobs right now and trying to figure out the best way to start...

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Thanks so much, Susi! Learning by doing is a great approach - that's brilliant!

When I worked in Germany it took me a while to get used to a QWERTZ keyboard, but I sure appreciated having Ä, Ö, Ü and ß available to my fingers, rather than having to do Alt plus whatever the numerical codes were - I seem to remember 132, 129, 228 and - gosh, I can't remember. Happy days!

I embarked on a post grad Dip Trans in the late 90s, but it occurred to me very quickly that I was overcommitted already with my time, so I didn't continue past the first term. Bit of a shame. So I'm thrilled to hear that you're a translator - I'm sure the job search will prove fruitful!

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We had both typing and shorthand offered in hs, but as a guy I felt I was pushing the envelope(!), so I opted for typing only. Our instructor always threatened to lay down a row of taped thumbtacks, for letting fingers sag on the keyboard! Ahh, those kinder days!

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I toyed with shorthand for the ten minutes it took every gasket in my brain to blow, just mud! 🤣

Nice one with the typing! But oh gosh, the threat of taped thumbtacks?! That's hardcore!

I'm so lazy in that respect these days, I guess as a result of improved ergonomics and the fact that these days I type on a laptop rather than a typewriter. My wrists are on the desk the entire time (shhhhhhh)! 😁

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(no worries!)🤫

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🤣

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Love it. I had to look up what ‘a complete flannel’ meant! (And I’m old! But Australian) I found ‘If you describe what someone has said as flannel, you disapprove because they have said a lot but they have avoided telling you what you wanted to know.’ Good to know. Grin.

I am also a ‘get-it-all-down’ minute-taker, but I’m kind enough to carefully go through it and summarise it before sending it on to others. People who have missed meetings love it because they feel like they were actually there. I’m sure others would prefer more concise dot points, but if I’m taking minutes, I’m listening intently (to keep myself awake - the only reason I ever volunteer to be secretary) and typing frantically (on my iPad!) and making sure I get down all the stuff that actually matters (to me).

I do find your ‘location blindness’ fascinating. What does your brain retain as you travel around? Or are you just living in an inner fantasy world all the time and simply oblivious to real life?? Intriguing.

Anyway, another lovely read. Thanks so much dear Rebecca. Sending heaps of hugs and best wishes. 🤗🤗😘

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Oh Beth, you sound like a much better minute-taker than I ever was! Mine were more like hours than minutes... 🤣

That's such an interesting question about what my brain retains! When I'm out and about I'm not conscious of NOT taking in information, but whenever I visit a place again, even when I know I've been there, I only seem to recognise things (landmarks, shops, roundabouts if I'm in the car) rather than the bits in between them. I always make Jim laugh when we're out on the road - he usually drives if we're together (that's a whole story in itself, trust me!) - by saying stuff like 'oh, this is a pretty road', at which point he'll tell me that I said that the day before yesterday when we were last travelling along it. 'Every day is a whole new journey to you!' he tells me!

I think I'm just a little odd! 🤣

Thanks for your lovely comment, Beth - hope you're having a super weekend (actually I think it's nearly Monday already Down Under)!

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Yes, 9:30pm Sunday down here. I’ve had a lovely weekend though, so thanks. Hope yours is wonderful too.

If you’re making comments about how pretty a road is, then you’re definitely ’in the moment’ which is the most important thing. I spent many years living in an internal fantasy world - not conducive to detailed recall about the things around me - but at least that’s not your issue. Just retention I gather.

Like all those poor dementia patients who have the wonderful opportunity of meeting new people every day.... hmmmm..... I definitely don’t get the impression that that’s your problem either thankfully. Just a somewhat different brain. We’re all unique thankfully.

Take care dear Rebecca. All the best.

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Yay for a somewhat different brain! What I love about the human race is that we have so much in common - including our uniqueness! It's such a beautiful balance! 😊

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Summer goal: type something, anything on one of the 6 ancient typewriters from my mom’s collection. Hopefully the ribbons hold up!

(I took typing class in high school on MANUAL typewriters! The sound of that classroom!)

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Oh, Amie, what an absolutely gorgeous idea for a project! I would so love to read about that!

Manual typewriters - yes, they were on the scale of industrial machinery, weren't they, both in terms of effort and noise?! My first typewriter was a really cool kids' one from the mid 1980s (must have been 1984, in fact, because that was the Christmas I had asked for ice skates but received a typewriter 🤣 - I loved it, but I had to hit the keys soooo hard to make an impression on the paper)!

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Lovely glimpse into your past. And you're bilingual! A woman of so many facets--and sense of humor to go with all that.

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Mary, you're so kind - I really appreciate you! A more accurate adjective to describe my linguistic prowess these days is 'rusty', I'm afraid. But I absolutely love the German language - it's beautiful.

Here in UK the first foreign language my generation learned at school was French, and then, a little later, German. I didn't really love the former but made a real connection with the latter. These days schools are teaching Spanish and French, and German doesn't really get a look-in, which I feel is a great shame, especially as Germany packs such a big economic/industrial/political punch in contemporary Europe. In 2020 I looked into training as a teacher of German and French, but so very few schools have German on their curriculum that there just aren't training options available for that combination. Oh well!

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